Interesting Conversations I’ve heard in Public Transport

I probably spend more than 15 hours a week on public transport. An experience that would be torturous if not for the wonderful people I hit in the face with my backpack and smush against until there are no barriers between us. These people provide me with endless entertainment as I dedicate these long hours to eavesdropping on their conversations. So to celebrate these people and the invasion of privacy that is not confined to online activity let me share with you some interesting conversations I have heard on public transport in Bogotá:

artwork by: Manuel Zapata vimeo.com/94527747 instagram:EL_TACo
artwork by: Manuel Zapata vimeo.com/94527747
instagram:taco_designs

I. Indecision (two girls):

-Qué vas a hacer?

– Nada ver el partido con Juan

-Volvieron?!

-Si…bueno, no, o si… no sé. El man me busco el domingo y me pidió que volviéramos a empezar. No le dije que sí y no le dije que no, entonces vamos a ver que pasa…

 

-What are you gonna do?

-Nothing, watch the game with Juan

-You’re back together?!?

-Yeah…well, no, or yeah…I don’t know. He called me on Sunday and asked me to start over. I didn’t say yes and I didn’t say no, so we’ll see what happens…

II. Tragedy (two guys):

– El abuelo de él me cae muy bien

-Si, el cucho es todo bien

-Que pesar lo del fallecimiento de su hijo

-Que?

-Si, el hijo del cucho que se murió

-Ah no, eso si no lo sabía

-Si, el man tomó afuera de la reserva y parece que mezcló con antibióticos o algo…bueno, igual eso uno nunca sabe, uno puede recibir guianza en el viaje y uno puede aprender pero pues…igual no se….eso es un video, por afuera toda esa gente es paz y amor pero en verdad es todo sectario y apenas llega alguien joven lo envidean con ese cuento de que está mal y no sé qué…es cómo en ese episodio de los Simpsons…

-I really like his grandpa

-Yeah, the old man’s cool

-It’s a shame about his son dying

-What?

-Yeah, the old man’s son died

-Oh, I didn’t know

-Yeah, dude took some outside of the reserve and it looks like he mixed with antibiotics or something…well, you never know with those things, you can receive guidance on the journey and you can learn but…I don’t know….it’s weird, on the outside all those people are peace and love but in reality it’s like a cult and as soon as a young person shows up they fill their head with ideas that they’re not ok and all that…it’s like on that episode of The Simpsons…

III. If Only (girl and her mother):

-Si mi papá los hubiera casado de peladitos mis hermanos no serían vagabundos…

-If dad had married them off young, my brothers wouldn’t be lowlifes…

IV. Brave (two girls):

-Y entonces el señor que manejaba la finca escuchó todo ese ruido y se vino y les dijo “ya, ustedes se están poniendo muy calientes, ya se robaron lo que se tenían que robar entonces ya ábranse”. Y ahí fue que nos dimos cuenta que él estaba trabajando con ellos

-Y se fueron esa noche?

-Obvio!

-Y la plata que habían pagado y eso qué?

-No pues no la devolvieron pero y eso que nos tocó pelearla porque la dueña de la finca no no la quería devolver, qué tal! Y no y eso que aparte se rompieron un montón de cosas

-Qué? Cuándo les robaron?

-Sii pues yo rompí un montón de platos, estaba re emputada y cogí la vajilla y la empecé a tirar al piso hasta que mi primo me dijo que me calmara que nos iban a cobrar. No y eso llegó la policía y todo y yo estaba como loca gritando

-y qué hizo la policía?

-no pues se llevaron al que cuidaba la finca y el descarado me acusó que porque lo había cascado

-Lo cascaste!??

-Claro, no ves que yo a ese hijueputa lo prendí! Yo cogí un palo y le empecé a dar. Qué tal! Por culpa de ese malparido se entraron a robar y le dispararon a mi primo!

 

-So then the groundskeeper of the finca heard all that noise and came in and told them “Ok, you’re getting too rowdy, you already stole what you wanted to steal so get the fuck out,” and that’s when we realized he was working with them

-Did you guys leave that night?

-Of course!

-What about your money?

-Well we got it back but we had to fight for it ‘cause the owner of the finca didn’t wanna give it back to us! No, and also a bunch of things were broken

-What? When they stole from you?

-Yeah well, I broke a bunch of plates, I was so fucking angry and I took the dishes and I started smashing them on the floor until my cousin told me to calm down, that they were gonna charge us. The police came and everything and I was screaming like a lunatic

-What did the police do?

-They took the groundskeeper, and that shameless ass told them I had beaten him up

-You beat him up!?!

-Of course! I fucked that son of a bitch up! I got a big stick and started beating him. Because of that fucker they broke in and shot my cousin!

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3 thoughts on “Interesting Conversations I’ve heard in Public Transport

  1. But..how were you able to recall the fine details!? Did you write them down afterwards after being inspired to do so? Some of these are indeed hilarious.

    1. Yeah I’m a huge dork so I actually have a word document where I write down things I hear after I get home. My original idea wasn’t to post or share it, it was just for me, but then I thought it’d be interesting to write a blog post with some of the ones I’ve written down.

      haha yeah I think my favorite one is the story where she beats the guy up for helping the others break in. I was cracking up as they were talking!

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